next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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