And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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