As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
