Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Randomize