u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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