Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
