I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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