I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
