yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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