I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
