is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
