Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
