my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
