I CAN MOONWALK!
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize