Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
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