is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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