I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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