I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i just had sex bonerless
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
