You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
soo... how was my night?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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