Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize