This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize
