my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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