Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
