Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face