so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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