i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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