HIV tests are more positive than that guy
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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