what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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