Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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