hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
im about as happy as oj after his trial
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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