Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
