I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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