am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
