Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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