You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
