I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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