my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize