I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
