I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
We were destined to go to rehab together
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
