dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?