I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
