wat bout pragnant strippers??
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
