So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
