Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She bit a glass in half.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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