Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I wish I only lived at night.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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