remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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