OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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