some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
soo... how was my night?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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