Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
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me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
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I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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