The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
