The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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