So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
You are the jesus of drinking
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
