Heybabeimwearingurpanties
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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