I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
